Friday, September 21, 2012

A Simple Prayer

Lord, forgive my jealous heart. Help me find a way to be happy for those who receive the blessings that I so desperately long for. Continue to remind me of everything you have already blessed me with. Thank you for your unfailing love. Amen.

-Heather

Monday, September 17, 2012

"Like Friends"

A couple of weeks ago, amidst the trials and turmoil of this case, B and I were taking a walk with the pups and decided to stop at our neighborhood park for some play time. Usually I sit at a picnic table and watch the kiddos play, but that day I decided to take part in the fun. Little B ran toward the big toy and I began to chase her, following her up the stairs and down the slide. When our feet hit the bark, we both giggled with delight at how much fun sliding together had been. As we ran back to the big toy for some more fun, sweet little B stopped, looked up at me and said, "You play with me Mama?" "Yes," I said. "I play with you." "Like friends?" she said. "Yes. Just like friends," I replied. "Yay!" she shouted with delight:) That moment warmed my soul and made me realize how much I need to treasure this special relationship I have with my foster daughter. "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me." Lord, thank you for my foster children. Help me to cherish the tenderness and faithfulness of a child.

-Heather

Thursday, September 6, 2012

The Neverending Case

When I call this "The Neverending Case," that's because it truly feels as though this case has no end. Each time we seemingly meet a milestone, something happens to derail the progress and forward movement. Ronnie and I attended the kiddos' "final" court hearing a couple of weeks ago, before heading into the Merits Trial. We were shocked and dismayed when the judge ever-so-casually extended the case another 4 months. Yes, I said 4 months, people. And that's just until we go to court again. The Merits Trial (which is supposed to be the final court hearing in the entire case) isn't even scheduled until January. We were so surprised by this ruling that we didn't even know what to do or say as we walked out of the courthouse. We were upset, to put it lightly... there were many tears on my end. And while this puts us as foster parents in a continued state of limbo, my main focus and concern is centered around our foster children and what this ruling means for their futures.

J & B were originally placed in Foster Care in April of 2011. And here they are in September of 2012 with the end of the case nowhere in sight. The judges, case workers and people within the legal system have NO IDEA what this process has done to these children. It has caused so much pain, confusion, sadness and anger that I fear may not be reversible. In a perfect world, the system would not be centered around the parents and giving them multiple chances to get their lives in order; it would center around the CHILDREN and what is truly best for them. And news flash: it MAY not involve the biological family whatsoever. I'm not saying that foster children should not be reunited with their bio. parents or family members. What I am saying, and many foster parents can attest to this, is that sometimes children deserve more than what their bio. families are able to offer them. This entire situation has been incredibly confusing for the children and J continues to have emotional outbursts because of the failures of this system and of his family. Please keep us in your prayers as we seek to get adequate help for J while learning how to help him control his anger and emotions.

While we do have an idea where this case is headed, which for now will remain confidential, we are also realistic and know that anything is possible over the course of a few months. We don't understand why certain decisions are made within the legal system, but we are glad that for now the kiddos have a safe and loving home where they can continue to thrive. Ronnie and I truly believe that these kiddos are still with us for a reason. We have rededicated ourselves to J & B and we want to use this time to go even deeper with them, helping them discover who it is that God created them to be.

Last week J started Kindergarten and that has opened up a whole new world for him. He is exhausted by the time he gets home, but hopefully that means a good night's sleep. I am trying to find a Preschool or Kids Day Out Program to enroll B in so that she can continue to learn and be challenged academically. And I'm not gonna lie... it would be nice to have a few personal hours to myself each week as well:) We are also in the process of signing J up for gymnastics and B for either tumbling or dance classes. We want to help them pursue their interests and invest in them as much as we can for whatever length of time they happen to be with us. Lord, give us courage to face the next few months of the unknown and the strength to face the inevitable challenges that will come our way.

-Heather